Day 1

Today I woke up with an uneasy feeling. Didn't feel like getting out of the bed. Got up, got ready. No shower, hardly had any time and it was so cold. 13F superfreezing it was today.I think I would like to live at a warmer nicer place like california or florida, beachy! 

Then I didn't even know what happened I just started crying, felt like missing home. Was I really missing home? or the warmth and love of home. It is what you feel right? So love and warmth is here? Why didn't I feel it? M I missing something in myself? But how can I? I am God's favorite child I know. No, I am complete. Only I need to show and express my self, my love, my true side to others without worrying if I say it right or wrong. Don't hold yourself back, who cares if someone likes u or hate u? U follow your path. Be loud. Be who you want to be. Look back at life, people I used to get shy away from, do they matter anymore? They might have been great friends if you would have expressed your true self to them. Like dilip u showed him your true side, and he is now my good friend. Dilip you're right unique happens to everyone, and it's going to happen to me too. And when I'll be in fellowship I'll have this incredible unique story to tell. Thanks universe for the incredible story and new good friends like him. And yes I didn't express my true self to Dr. David. Forget that he is your teacher, make him your friend. And you'll see the change in him and you'll feel more free.

Then I went into my lil space and listened to songs that soothen my soul. And I was fine. After that it actually went pretty well. I liked how universe was making sure to cheer me up with little little things. Thankyou beautiful uni! 

Even I met Emaya on my way back which I had hardly expected, felt good. I like the way she is, she is very smooth talker. And knows what to say, when to say. I would like to develop great communication skill like her, like Dr. Rolan. And then eating jeevana's bhelpuri and talking to purush was refreshing. It felt good.

Signing off for today.

See you tomorrow.

Memories to be cherished..2013 in flashback!

Here we are stepping in 2014, Let's take it slowly and savour 2013 special moments.

So it was an year of mixed experiences. Planning to focus on the ones that truly nourished me, and others I would take as a lesson.

Spending time with my cousins esp monish and amisha has always been refreshing for me. Love mani's wit and sense of humor and gudia's carefree nonjudgemental fun kinda attitude. So I forced them to come to ldh from maur. Maur reminds me of maamiji, I am sure God is taking good care of her and maybe she'll be back in healthy body now. She always used to cook my fav dish 'kadi' whenever I went there. She loved me as much as she loved Rimpy, maybe a lil less but can you actually quantify love? It is there or it is not.
It was not easy to see her going. It kind of disrupted whole family in maur esp rimpy and baiji were the ones most affected and maamaji. But I always admire baiji for his strength, love how he took care of himself and that way he is more capable of taking care of others. I know now it's fine, still that space can never be filled. I am sure her love still surrounds us. Bless her soul and lots of love for u maamiji.

We went to ludhiana after that, and we played cricket in our street, played monopoly manu got for us, he is crazy over it. Was it before? Doesn't matter. Played badminton with gudia, cycled with her sitting on bar in front of the seat of cycle..oo that was fun. we were in nightsuits, everyone looking at us. and then we teased one lil kid, he liked it too and we raced with him. I love spending time with her.

Then I got my match results, here comes a lesson. Be prepared for what u have to do next? So now I didn't know what to do. Anyways God always shows the way. And on harleen's persuasion I applied in University of Missouri and got observership here. Now it's been 5 months here. It has been up and down ride, no worries, it's just a ride. I made some good friends here. Harleen became my great buddy.

What is the best moment I had in missouri?
cycling
waking up to the most beautiful weather
celebrations with harleen
pancakes at IHOP
great moments with dr. david
chat with dr. kale, like I am talking to a part of myself
meeting dr. nanda, would love to inculcate few of his qualities, so calm and vibrant
meeting dr. rolan, he is such a smooth talker. his handshake is so firm, when he talks it feels like love flowing out of him, so calm and so funny. and such a compassionate wonderful conversationalist
staying with supreet in new jersey, she had 2kids but when I first saw her it felt I am looking at their sister, admire her completely
staying with shilp and his gf, both were very caring and helping
preinterview dinner at university of missouri, felt so easy and at home
talk with annamarie, jodi, dianne, linda, dan, marc, billy, tammy, michelle. it felt so easy and wonderful
bowling experience, dinner on new year's eve, new year's eve was amazing with the cold wind blowing still felt good looking at rolling leaves, lighted tree, beautiful church.

That was 2013 in summary. Now here I am in 2014, ready to be who I have become, more confident, more vibrant, more compassionate, more beautiful both inside out and more fun.

What I would like to happen this year?
I want to Match!
I want to be with my soulmate.
I want to start training for my residency.
I would like to get gifts for everyone with my 1st salary.
I would like to know completely who I am.
I would like to own my true power.
I would like wonderful beautiful things happening to and around me.
I would like to be a great doctor and a superb humanbeing like dr rolan and dr nanda.

Thank you universe for the year 2013 and year 2014. Thank you for making my dreams come true. Thank you.